Thursday Thirteen - Emma

I've taken up the habit of apologizing to my mom about once a week for any, um, undesirable behavior I may have exhibited as a child. Because I'm quite certain karma has come back to bite me in the backside.

Emma is a drama queen. And she's a ham. And while she is quite possibly the cutest girl child I have ever laid my eyes on, she's a handful. And she owns that title proudly.

So for my first ever Thursday Thirteen, here are 13 "Emmaisms" that sometimes make me want to bust out laughing, sometimes make me want to bang my head against a wall, and sometimes make me want to lock her up for the rest of her life.

1. Foot stomping - She just turned 2 in April and has developed a defiant foot stomp that I wasn't expecting until her preteen years. I ask her to do something and she stomps her foot, crosses her arms, flips her hair and says no. It's precious. Sometimes.
2. Screaming - O.K. This one doesn't make me want to laugh. Ever. The girl has a set of pipes on her that rivals the best sopranos in our church choir. She has actually made wine glasses that were hanging in another room ring from the severity of her scream.
3. Head shaking - This one cracks me up, but I'm afraid it will lead to either vomit or personal injury. While sitting in her booster seat, she shakes her head violently until she looks like she is going to pass out. She laughs as well as a disoriented person can and repeats 5 times.
4. Singing - Emma will sing anytime, any place. But only if she feels like it. She's quite the performer when the mood strikes her and she looks lovely holding her microphone and singing what I think is "Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star" at the top of her lungs.
5. Shoe kicking - She hates shoes. She doesn't like putting them on and as soon as she has the opportunity she kicks them off. One of these days, I just know that we'll be in the car and she will actually hit the driver in the back of the head with a high flying sandal.
6. Inappropriate diaper removal - We've had to start putting her in onesies whenever she is in her crib because we've had too many messes to clean up from her taking her diaper off. Now, she still tries to take it off through her onesie. It's quite a sight to get her up from her nap and see that she has tried to pull her diaper off through the leg hole of her clothes.
7. 1,000,000 faces - I have never seen so many facial expressions on any one person except for maybe myself. She can turn them on and off in the blink of an eye. It's really quite amazing...and a little disturbing.
8. "Help you?" - She is really big into helping now which is usually great. But sometimes she offers help when you don't necessarily need it and gets quite frustrated with you when you aren't gracious enough to accept her help. She really likes to help me go to the bathroom. Which basically means she stands there and stares at me and then cheers when I'm done. Good times.
9. "Rocks!!!" - Emma loves rocks. I don't know why. She likes to climb on the big ones and carry small ones she finds. Her favorite is when people use rocks instead of mulch for their landscaping. She gets so excited when she sees all those rocks there for the taking...and throwing.
10. Dancing - She knows a thing or two about tempo, this one. When it's fast music she runs around like she's got ants in her pants. When it's slow music, she slows down and channels Stevie Wonder in slow motion. Someone has even taught her to close her eyes and sway when the music is slow enough. I don't know who that could've been.
11. Falling down - Another of her favorite pasttimes is running in place and then suddenly falling down on her butt. She's actually airborn for a minute because she jumps first, she just chooses to not put her feet down on the descent.
12. Volume control - This kind of relates to the screaming. Emma knows one volume: loud. She hasn't quite grasped the whole idea of "inside voice" so everything that comes out of her mouth is a yell. I keep a constant supply of Tylenol for the headaches.
13. Hugs - This girl gives the best hugs in the whole world. Every time she hugs you it's as if there is no one thing she would rather be doing at that exact moment. She holds on for dear life and doesn't let go. They make my heart melt.